Reflections Thus Far

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I find myself daydreaming of 2016. What a fresh start the new year will bring. I know the new year will have its hurts and challenges and struggles all the same, but it also brings with it newness, beginning, and potential. I am choosing to focus on the latter right now.

I think this will be the first summer since 2010-ish that I will not have a wedding of a close friend or sibling. But I know of three babies due in the new year. Crazy how babies tend to follow weddings, no? Instead of getting married myself, I will keep scouring Pinterest for pictures of dogs and overly expensive handbags, thankyouverymuch, while also looking forward to snuggling those little babes and thinking of ways to spoil them without upsetting their parents too much.


But all this looking ahead to the future has me thinking about the past. I think part of what has made this last year so difficult is, for the first time, I finally feel like I am in "real life." In 2011, I was going through a transition every couple of months and had yet to settle in to anything. In 2015, I am in my fifth year of teaching, I have my own apartment with accompanying bills, and I eat sweet potato chips and hummus for supper if I want to. I am not in a honeymoon phase in life-- this is my life.


Life is broken and beautiful and messy and simple, but rarely is it ever one thing at a time. I have truly relished trying to make the most of this December and I have enjoyed it so much. I'm looking forward to seeing family at the end of the week although I can hardly wrap my mind around such. Contrary to my initial plans, I have not been back to the airport since I landed in July. But, like many things, I am really hoping to fix my lack of travel in this upcoming year. I'm currently investigating the likes of Taiwan, Malaysia, Singapore, Vietnam, and maybe a touch of Europe as well.


I am also finding some life in my work again. Granted, I am at an easier point of the semester, but I am looking forward to beginning work again in January. This first semester simply flew by and I know I missed so many opportunities. I am hoping the spring semester will be much different and I will make the most of what I have left with my students before their exams and graduation.


Babies, traveling, and students-- all things that will make a wonderful 2016-- even when life is real!

December Goals

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I've honestly had these goals ready since the first of the month, but I've been busy living December and it's been a pretty sweet feeling. I set a couple of small goals this month to help me finish the year strong but without too much stress and worry about a list.
May your week be blessed!

A Second Chance on the Second Chance... Christmas Edition

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As part of fighting to finish this year strong, I am going to finish this year's book club by hosting our last month's selection, A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens. Amazon even offers a free electronic copy of the book so I have no excuses to not make this happen! 


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I specifically chose A Christmas Carol back in January because I thought it would be fun to read a Christmas book during the holiday season. I've never read anything of Charles Dickens' from start to finish, so I figured I may as well start with one of his shorter works (approximately 64 pages as compared to 304 pages... I'm looking at you A Tale of Two Cities). Furthermore, I have seen Mickey's Christmas Carol more times than I can count and as a person who staunchly swears by reading the book before I see the movie, it's high time to make A Christmas Carol happen.


The questions will go up December 18 and we will discuss the day after Christmas on December 26. I will be posting from America while wearing no fewer than five layers, but I am looking forward to that so dearly!



K+K Entzel


Please join me for kicking back during this last month of the year and read a classic piece of Christmas literature! And as Kelly and I plan for book club in 2016, we would love to have your input for next year's selections. Clearly we tried to focus on classics this last year, but we are looking to expand our genres in our second round of book club and are very interested in what you would like to read. Input on genres and/or specific titles is more than welcome!

The Thrill of Hope

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2011 ranks as the worst year of my life. I experienced being denied student teaching, losing my grandpa, separating from a friend for no apparent reason, almost losing my dad, and getting through my first semester as a teacher. To add insult to injury, my undergraduate graduation was anticlimactic on many levels and I walked away from college feeling let down by the whole experience. I did experience two incredible highs that year in working my first summer at camp and spending Christmas with my dad at home with us. But overall, 2011 is a year I don't want back.

Isn't that the way it goes, though, that the highest of highs always come with the lowest of lows?


2015 is a year that I will not want back either. As I look back on this year, I will not be sorry to see it go. Contrary to 2011, the events that were supposed to be the highs of this year were undeniably marred by the lows. These last 11 months have been ones of heartbreak and loss and betrayal in ways that I never imagined or expected. People have let me down, I have let others down, and I have let myself down. People have failed me, I have failed others, and I have failed myself. Some of the story is mine to tell but much of it is not. Even though I have taken every step of my own journey, I have not been alone and I owe those who have journeyed with me the respect of sharing their perspective as they so choose. I just know that when the ball drops on December 31, I will not wish 2015 back.


As somebody who usually brings back Christmas tunes in April and starts listening consistently in October, this year has been odd in that I only started listening to Christmas music this past Wednesday. As such, I feel more anticipation and magic for the season than I have in many years past. In the same way, these words have resonated with me intensely as of late:



The thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices.

I am oh. so. weary in oh. so. many ways. However, I still have a month left of 2015 and it is a month I do not want to waste. I know the odds of 31 days bringing complete change to my life are fairly low, but I am choosing to fight for each moment this next month brings. I watched "A Charlie Brown Christmas" this morning and found myself amazed by the simplicity of what Christmas should be. My Savior was born to bring hope and life to all. Hope is not something I have had much of this last year. But this advent season is slowly renewing my hope. And that's a beautiful feeling.


30||Coffee (and Bars) Before We Part

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A farewell coffee date. Take some time to breath, sip a warm drink, and share with your new blogging buddies. If you'd like a prompt: how did the Blog-tember Challenge go for you? Any surprises? What was your favorite prompt, or what would you like to see included next time?

Since I am from the Midwest, I would like to offer you both coffee and bars. I didn't know "bars" were a Midwest thing until I moved away. Since it's still quite warm over here in Thailand, I'll be enjoying an iced Americano, but I won't judge you for your PSL if that's what your heart desires.

I am just going to be up front, I can't believe I actually finished all 30 days of the Blog-tember Challenge! This at least the third, although I really think it's the fourth, month-long blogging challenge that I have started, but it's the first one that I actually ever finished. (Heck, I'm still working on finishing last year's Blog-Tember challenge. Ahem.) Some posts from the last month are definitely stronger than others, but I wrote 30 posts in 30 days and I'm pretty happy about that. I'm really hoping to be able to continue through "31 Days of Thailand" as part of the 31 Days writing challenge and then follow through with a consistent blogging pattern after that.

My favorite prompt was probably sharing my passion as I truly learned something about myself. Perhaps a post to see next year would be to explain how our individual names came to be since we explained blog names this year. Just a thought. Regardless, I know I will be on the lookout for Blog-Tember in 2016!

And, because bars are apparently a North Dakota thing, I will leave you with my favorite banana bars recipe. It's actually my mom's recipe and I'm pretty sure she got it out of one of her "Taste of Home" recipes from forever ago. I'm not even kidding... I think she has 11 years worth of magazines? I just won't admit to fighting her for reading them first because I enjoyed them almost as much as she did. But, anyhow, these banana bars will be good with coffee of any sort, hot or cold, and probably even with a PSL because I think they are just that good. These may be mom's most requested pot luck recipe and that's saying a lot because mom's food is in high demand in most any social situation. I suppose I should be giving you a pumpkin recipe seeing as it is fall and all, but I live in the tropics so banana it is! I am grateful to have learned to cook and bake from the best and I know my friends are grateful as well... Ha! So, because I want to share some North Dakota love with you, I bring you now Dorine's banana bars.

1/2 cup butter, softened                        2 cups flour                                    3 T. butter, melted
1-1/2 cups sugar                                   1 tsp. baking soda                          2-1/2 cups powdered sugar
1 cup (8 oz.) sour cream                       1 cup bananas, mashed
1 tsp. vanilla                                          3/4 cup (6 oz.) cream cheese, softened

Cream together butter and sugar. Add eggs, sour cream, and vanilla. Gradually add flour and baking soda to creamed mixture. Mix in bananas. Spread into a greased 15x10-in. jelly roll sized pan. Bake at 350F for 20 to 25 minutes or until a toothpick inserted at the center comes out clean. Cool. Beat together cream cheese and melted butter. Gradually add enough powered sugar to achieve desired frosting consistency. Frost bars and store in refrigerator. Makes 2 dozen.

I would include a picture of a batch I made myself but I'm moving this week(end) and don't want to have to move more than I already have in my possession. So, I suppose that just means I will have to make a batch later to photograph. The sacrifices I am willing to make, all for the blog, of course!

Thank you for joining me this month! I have enjoyed myself and I hope you have too!



Brave Love Blog

29||Coming to a Blog Near You

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Write your own list of 10 blog topics to inspire us next month.

I am so grateful this Blog-tember challenge came when it did. For the most part (like 95% part) I have enjoyed writing this month and I also feel, dare I say, that I have finally found something of a blogging groove. So much so, in fact, that I am planning to complete another blogging challenge in October. But, that being said, I will no longer have anybody giving me daily topics on which to write, so now I'm left to my own devices to generate material daily. While my ultimate goal is to post four or five times each week, I will take this current boost of creativity and ride it as long as I am able. 

My next month will be "31 Days of Thailand" as part of the Write 31 Days challenge during which I will not only share about my life overseas, but also take the time to document some of my adventures (and non-adventures) of the last 15-ish months.
Then, come November, here are some topics I have ready for the month:
... Maybe Someday, Part 2
... Monthly goals
... Fantasy Football
... My apple pie recipe
... How to celebrate fall in the tropics
... Thoughts on going home for Christmas

And here are a couple of ideas I'd love to see somebody else share about:
... Favorite coffee drink recipes
... Easy breakfast ideas (Please!)
... Bible study/quiet time ideas

I am looking forward to keeping up with people post Blog-tember and seeing how they carrying on with "normal" life. I welcome you to join me as well!


Brave Love Blog

28||A Day in My Life

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A day in the life. Take us through it with you.

I was going to be a good blogger and take little pictures throughout my day but that just didn't happen. Plus, one thing I really like about my schedule this year is that each of my days is just different enough from the others that I never get too bored with things. With that being said, here's what a typical use of time during my day.

6:05 a.m... The alarm goes off. I stumble around my apartment getting dressed, putting in my contacts, brushing my teeth, etc.

6:30 a.m.... I'm out the door for my 2 minute commute to work.

6:32 a.m.-3:00 p.m.... Teaching and students! We have a five day, rotating block schedule and I never have two days in a row that are exactly the same.

3:00-4:30 p.m... Either coaching or tutoring. I am working with the JV volleyball team this first season and I have an SAT tutoring student, so I am typically meeting with somebody during this time for one reason or another.

4:30-5:00 p.m.... Lay on my bed under the air con and relish the silence. No music, no talking. Just a book if I'm feeling really crazy.

5:00-9:00 p.m.... Supper, grad school, teacher prep, etc. I like to get out in the evenings and head to a coffee shop to work, but sometimes and evening in does the soul well too.

9:00 p.m.... Technology off and reading lamp out.

10:00+ p.m.... Reading and sleep. I have terrible sleep habits and have never fallen asleep easily but I am working to develop more healthy sleeping patterns. I read until I'm sleepy then turn the light out and hope for the best!



Brave Love Blog

27||My "Christmas Is Coming" List

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What's on your wish list? Be sure to include links so we can shop too.

In the last couple of years, I have really worked to value people and experiences over things, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate a new pretty every once in awhile. Since Christmas is coming (My mom says Christmas is coming any time post-July 1... It's a long wait at our house.), what better time than to give a couple of suggestions for the upcoming months!



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I have a rocky relationship with meat and will only eat it well done. No pink for this girl, thankyouverymuch. e. Coli is my enemy. I don't know why I haven't bought a meat thermometer before now, but the time has come. This particular thermometer is extra appealing because it can double as a candy and deep frying thermometer-- multifunctionality is always a selling point for me! I feel like I should lead off my Christmas list with something more exciting than a meat thermometer, but well-cooked meat is worth it!


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I realize that I am probably the last English teacher on the face of the earth to have not read this book, especially considering my proclamation of love of its prequel, To Kill a Mockingbird. However, the book released two days after my return to Thailand this summer and when I mentioned it as a potential Christmas gift, my mom took the bait, so I'm hoping hard for this one. I don't care what they say about Atticus... I am looking forward to reading this book regardless.


1/2/3
Although I am not much of an accessory girl, I do enjoy earrings and watches. I find myself wearing a watch quite often, even if I end up putting it on and taking it off multiple times throughout the day. I have one watch right now that is coming to see its better days, so I am looking for some supplemental options. I love the fun pattern of the first watch plus its makers, Modest Gold, have a fun store with a great mission. The mixed media of the second watch is very attractive to me and the leather/gold combination makes it a very versatile piece. Finally, I love the mystery of the dark wooden watch and I love that it is made of bamboo! The detail on the watch face is unique and the piece as a whole would be easy to dress up or dress down! Plus, it's an Etsy product and I enjoy supporting small businesses whenever I am able.
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Because I am an earring girl, I included these beauties. I am bummed they are currently sold out on the Nordstrom website, but I am hoping they become available again soon. I love the muted gold and the simple design. I have quite a few pairs of earrings but my studs selection is lacking and these would be a beautifully basic addition to my collection.
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And to continue with the basic stud collection, I included these lovelies. I bought the Target knockoffs this summer and have come to enjoy them more than I ever expected and wear them more often than I thought I would. I am afraid that each day I wear them will be the day be ears rebel and reject them, so I would love to add a higher quality Nordstrom pair in silver to my collection.

Bonus: Cash. I know it's not kosher to wish for money, but I am working hard to pay down my debt. Any extra cash sent my way will be spent on eliminating my pesky month loan payments. I am so over giving those lenders money each month. Here's to getting them off of my back in the next two years!



Brave Love Blog

26||Currently Reading

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What's on your to-read list, and what have you recently read? 

What a dangerously loaded question this is... I am an English teacher after all. In an effort to be completely transparent, I listed each book on my "active" reading list. Some of these books I definitely spend more active time on than others, but they are all one of the top of my priorities right now.

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9

I am reading Crazy Love, the Harry Potter Series, and I Am Malala for personal pleasure. Rhetoric and Human Consciousness is my main grad school text for the semester although we also read quite a few articles in that class. I use Everything's an Argument, They Say I Say, and the MLA Handbook, along with an assortment of essays, in my AP class and Things Fall Apart is my current World Literature text. Total Truth is my current professional development reading.

I certainly don't read each of these books at an equal rate and some I certainly enjoy more than others.

I haven't really read anything else recently outside of Harry Potter and I probably won't have time for much else for awhile. I'm back in the throes of grad school which I am enjoying, but it doesn't leave time for much else. I am hoping to get my hands on Library of Souls soon as well as resurrect 2C Book Club for October which means I will be reading Frankenstein which was my own suggestion, so I looking forward to it extra!

As I said before, my book list will always exceed my time available, but that won't make me any less ambitious!


Brave Love Blog


25||Music to My Ears

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Three songs you are connecting with right now.

I pretty much always have music playing if for no other reason than background noise. I miss Pandora quite a bit in Thailand, but have quickly become the master of YouTube playlists. I have listened to enough that I have about five specific playlists that I frequent quite often. But, I still love pulling up specific songs for a focused jam session. Here are three of my current favorites that bring up happy memories of not too long ago.

"Shut Up and Dance." This song will forever be my anthem of Summer 2015. I crank it up each time I think back on my most recent days in the States and I am immediately taken back to Target Field. I do try to keep my dance moves to myself, but when I'm the only one around to watch, I do shut up and dance. 

"Build Your Kingdom Here." This is another anthem of the summer. This song first caught my attention the morning after my sister's wedding. I know that I am super late to the Rend Collective Club, but I'm so glad I've finally found it. The words of this song are so true and the tune is catchy as well. 

"Reason to Sing." Simply stated, but I always have a reason to sing.



Brave Love Blog

24||Five of My Faves

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Shout out five of your favorite bloggers. Who are your regular reads?

Before I get down to the real business, first I want to wish Kelly a happy birthday! May the cupcakes be plenty, the calories nonexistent, and the spoils from Kyle be just what you need! I am grateful to have you as a friend and I thank Jesus for you!

Secondly, I am sharing my answers from yesterday's post. Kelly knows me better than I know her, I think. I was impressed with so many of her answers!

How did we meet? Aubrey and I first met at an Intervarsity Christmas party back in 2009. I would’ve been in my second year of college and Aubrey would’ve been in her fourth? *feel free to add in your comments, Aubrey* This is true. I had just transferred back to UND after a semester-long mini crisis and wasn't really planning to make any new friends. How mistaken I was!


How old is Aubrey/Kelly? When is her birthday? Aubrey is in her 20s and she doesn’t like to tell her real age. But...she’s currently closer to 30 than she’d like. So she’s basically dead. One year I forgot if her birthday was on Valentine’s Day or not...so I sent her flowers...for both, just to make sure I covered my bases. But her birthday is February 15. But her sister ruined it by being born the day after and she’ll never forgive her for it. And last year I forgot if Brooke was born before or after Aubrey...so I wished Brooke a Happy Birthday two days early! Sorry, I forgot...this isn’t about Brooke. Aubrey...back to you! So I'm 27.5. I'm already worried about 28. It just seems so old to me! It's so close to 30 which is so close to 40 and things just get out of hand from there! And my sister does still owe me a 5th birthday party. Maybe someday. A girl can hope.


Where does she currently live? Aubrey is living in school apartments in BKK, but she is waiting on her keys for her new apartment downtown. And it looks super cute! I will be moving the first of the month!


What is her favorite shoe size? Aubrey wears a size 10. Sometimes 9 ½. Okay...I’m not 100% on this, but I think I’m close? You are too gracious. My feet are disproportionately large. Let's just go with the 10 and call it good.


What is her favorite color? My guess is purple, but that’s because I don’t know so I figured I’d just pick my favorite color as a shot in the dark. Yes.... Purple, purple, and more purple!


What is her favorite book? So I can’t pick one. Because ultimately Aubrey’s favorite is The Bible. But I know she loves Crazy Love by Francis Chan and To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. What English teacher doesn’t like TKAM??  And are you a real English teacher if you don’t? All of this is true. Asking me to pick a favorite book is like asking a small child to pick a favorite toy. It just ain't gonna happen.


What is her favorite (non-alcoholic) drink? Aubrey will take a double iced Americano, straight up. Any day, any place.


What is her favorite cosmetic item? Her EOS chapstick. I think I bought her this one for her care package last spring. For cosmetics proper, I would say mascara. But the EOS is definitely in the top 3!


What is her favorite TV show? She’s a huge fan of Grey’s Anatomy and The Big Bang Theory. I know it’s weird, but those are two that I watch too. And NCIS. I love me a male protagonist, I guess.


What is her favorite dessert? Pie. If you’re helping her plan her future wedding, make sure to suggest pie instead of wedding cake...she’ll love you forever. If my groom ever shows up, he'll have to be okay with pie. Pie for days, as they say.


What was her high school mascot? The Tigers. Did the Christian school have a mascot? Idk. All I know about is Trenton. The Christian school was the Crusaders, but I am a Tiger forever.


What is her favorite restaurant? I’m going to go with Applebee’s or The Parrot’s Cay, because I don’t know the names of any restaurants she frequents in BKK. Any place with wings is a place dear to me. And in BKK, I am definitely a mood eater so it depends on the day and my current desires.


What is her favorite movie? Well, that depends on the movie of choice for any given day. I’d have to say She’s the Man or He’s Just Not That Into You or maybe even The Proposal. Those are close, but my two absolute favorites are The Little Mermaid and Sweet Home Alabama.


Who is her celebrity crush? Ryan Reynolds? Channing Tatum? Liam Hemsworth? Chris Hemsworth? Ohh...but I do know that she loves Jesse Williams’ eyes. So there’s that. Oi, I have commitment issues when it comes to a celebrity crush. But I will take Jackson Avery's eyes any day.


What was her first job? Aubrey’s first job was working for a conservation center? Yeah. I don’t know if that was her first job or if that’s even what it was called. All I know is that she has a fleece zip up from there and when she was in ND, she’d wear it often. I worked for the North Dakota State Historical Society at a local interpretive center. I enjoyed that job as long as I didn't have to go weed. And I did love that fleece. I still have it and whip it out in the coldest winter months.


What is her dream job? Aubrey’s dream job is to be a momma, a wife, and a teacher to teacher candidates. All at the same time. She’d even take being a professional student--without all of the debt associated with it. True and true. I enjoy my current role as a classroom teacher immensely but my current dream is to teach teachers. And totally true on the wife and children gig. My only requirements are Christian, tall enough that I can wear heels, and speaks English. (Clearly, moving to Buddhist Asia was not a good move in that direction.) Non-Duck Dynasty beards are not required, but encouraged.


What is her favorite season? What’s her favorite thing about that season? Aubrey’s favorite season has to be fall. Even though she lives in Thailand right now, she’ll always have a soft spot for jeans, a good flannel, a toasty bonfire, and watching a High School football game under those Friday Night Lights. I love fall and everything associated with it, minus the PSL. I do love me some pumpkin pie though!


What are Kelly & Aubrey most likely to do on a night together? We would probably start our night off with some HApps (aka, Half Apps at Applebee’s) because, why not? We both usually have an order of wings or a giant plate of nachos. Sometimes we share, but not frequently. We would drive to the Loaf ‘n’ Jug on University Ave to mix and buy the largest Icee we can get. The trip to Loaf ‘n’ Jug would be followed by an hour-ish in the car listening to worship music and sharing what’s on our hearts. We would drive through certain parts of the community and dream about living there with our families one day. Once we return to my residence, we would grab as many blankets as we have available, make some popcorn, and fall asleep to a movie (Pitch Perfect, She’s the Man, Dirty Dancing (Aubrey first exposed-poor word choice-me to the movie Dirty Dancing...can I put parenthesis within parenthesis? Well...I did.), The Proposal, or He’s Just Not That Into You, being at the top of our lists...although we wouldn’t normally turn down a Disney movie either). This is all so true. Every last bit of it.


What keeps us being friends? Aside from coffee and the same taste in movies, I’d have to say our consistent communication and our faith. We both love and serve the same God and He has placed us in the life of the other for a reason. In the years I’ve known Aubrey, she has become a dear person to me. We have laughed and cried together and we know what is on the other’s heart. I wouldn’t change that for anything. My husband even jokes that Aubrey must live at least a 15 minute’s drive away from us once she moves back to the states. I’m hoping for more of a 15 second commute. We’ll see. The 15 minute rule. Kyle swears it doesn't exist but I have my doubts...


What is your favorite memory with Aubrey/Kelly? Aubrey and I have so many memories together. It’s hard to choose a favorite. We had an fun interesting rollerblading excursion once. Key word: once. We’ve had some epic road trips. She used to play My Heart Will Go On on her recorder, lying on her stomach, in the middle of my living room….at 11:15 at night. But one memory that I will always treasure is the way she has invested in my life by being one of my best friends throughout the last *almost* six years. And for that very reason, I asked her to be my maid of honor in my wedding. *Don’t worry...my sister was my maid of honor too…* I’m so thankful that she agreed to stand up and support me in my marriage. I do have some sweet recorder skills. I rocked elementary music methods like nobody's business! My rollerblading skills leave much to be desired though.

And my top five reads are as follows...

Kelly at K&K Entzel because, well, my heart will always go on. Or something like that.

Kelly at Kelly's Korner. Hers was one of the first blogs I ever read consistently and I still read it today. She has faith, family, and a little bit of everything else.

Melanie at Big Mama. Again, more faith, more family, and I do enjoy her Fashion Friday posts.

I'm not thinking of two more right now, but I will add them when they come to mind. It's been a long day and I've already rewritten a grad school assignment so I think I am calling it a night!


Brave Love Blog

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